Fear can freeze your future—but purpose, when clearly defined, unlocks legacy.
In Part 2 of our conversation with Gary Harper, the focus shifts from systems to self-leadership. Gary unpacks how fear, misaligned vision, and lack of accountability prevent people from stepping fully into their calling. This episode challenges listeners to stop leading from emotion and start leading from purpose, discipline, and faith.
Gary introduces the three pillars of purpose—past, present, and future, explains why fear is rooted in ignorance, and shares why you must “put your own oxygen mask on first” before you can effectively lead others or build generational wealth.
Key Takeaways:
- 0:45 – Why fear thrives in ignorance and how knowledge dismantles doubt
- 2:32 – The difference between making statements and asking better, purpose-driven questions
- 5:10 – Why many people unknowingly chase someone else’s vision instead of their own
- 7:48 – The three pillars of purpose: learning from your past, stewarding your present, and preparing for your future
- 11:06 – How mindset and faith work together to sustain long-term growth
- 14:29 – The “oxygen mask principle” and why self-leadership must come before leading others
- 17:58 – Why clarity of purpose determines the legacy you leave behind
Legacy Moment:
You cannot lead others or build lasting legacy until you first take full responsibility for leading yourself.
Connect with Gary:
- Website: https://sharperbusiness.com/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/gary.harperii
Connect with Corwyn:
- Contact Number: 843-619-3005
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cmelette/
Shoutout to our Sponsor: Mellifund Capital, LLC
Need funding for your next real estate flip or build? MelliFund Capital makes it fast, flexible, and investor-friendly. Visit MelliFundCapital.com and fund your future today. Again, that’s MelliFundCapital.com, M-E-L-L-I-L-U-N-D, Capital.com.
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/corwyn-j-melette/support
SPEAKER 3:
Welcome back to part two of our 2026 kickoff with Gary Harper. In the first half we built the framework, now we’re tackling the heart. We’re diving into the paralyzing power of fear, the three pillars of purpose, and what to do when your season of success is stuck on wait. If you’re ready to lead yourself first so you can lead your legacy, stay tuned. The conclusion starts right now.
CORWYN:
Good morning and welcome to another episode of Exit Strategies Radio Show. I am your host, Corwyn J. Melette, broker and owner of Exit Realty Low Country Group in beautiful North Charleston, South Carolina. If this is your first time listening to this show, you sir or ma’am are in for a treat because our mission here is very simple. That is to empower our community through financial literacy and real estate education. We’re legacy building. That is what we do. So if you’re out there making things happen with your family, for the generations yet to come, our word teaches us to leave a legacy, to leave an inheritance for our children, our children’s children and so forth and so on. We want you to put a hashtag on that thing that says that you are legacy building because that is what you are doing. You can find us on Facebook, YouTube, Anchor FM. You can also find us on Instagram, at our website, exitstrategiesradioshow.com. You can catch us in a number of different places on your favorite podcast applications. We appreciate you listening. Please share this content with your friends, your family, your coworkers, even those in your groups, your church groups, et cetera, guys, because sometimes the message and the word that we are speaking here today is for you. Sometimes it is for someone else that you know. Again, we appreciate you listening. Let’s get started. So along that, because again, as you may mention up, Gary, all of this is interchangeable. People oftentimes want to make this thing, this and this thing that, but when you look at it as a whole, the commonalities are equal among all. You want to do something or fulfill some personal goal. You want to fulfill some business goal or whatever it may be. They all work the same. If you do this, this, this, this, then you will achieve it. So let’s put the spin on it a little bit, but let’s talk about the mistakes because the mistakes are common. The mistakes that people make in either facet, whether it’s their personal, hey, I want to have a family, I want to this, or hey, I want to build this business. What have you, what are the common mistakes and pitfalls? And what are some of the methods that people can employ to avoid them?
GARY:
Well, I mean, I think probably the biggest reason why I don’t think people accomplish their vision and goals is fear. They lay out the mistake of fear to show what’s ugly. The Bible says, do not fear over 300 times in the Bible. I think I was told one time off. It’s true, but they said it’s 365 times. Well, that makes a lot of sense if that’s true, because that’s how many days are in a year, right? So God’s trying to give us a little bit of a hint here of like, fear is not, Bible says, he’s not the author of fear or confusion, right? And so if he’s not the author of fear and confusion, then who is, and then why do we allow it to affect us so much? But I will tell you, I mean, I find fear is probably one of the biggest things. Like people have fear. And so like the way to overcome fear, because I have a lot of fears, right? I have my biggest fear in the world is flying, but I’ll be doing it today at one o’clock. You know, I fly five times a week. How did I overcome that? How do you overcome your fear? Well, I always tell people overcome fear with knowledge. The Bible talks about God being the author of knowledge, not confusion. So we always have to overcome fear with knowledge. One of the reasons I’m on your podcast today, and one of the reasons why it’s so popular is you do a phenomenal job, Corwyn, of what? Delivering knowledge. And what does that give people? It gives people the ability to overcome fear. And so fear has to replace with knowledge and sustain with faith. That’s what we have to have. You know, I talk about when I’m using this analogy, I think it resonates most with people. I say, you know, in 2020 COVID hit this world in a big way and people had a lot of fear. We shut down baseball, we shut down, let’s stay home in 14 days of slow spread and all the other, and even some of it nonsense that’s, you know, was driven out of fear. But today I’ll get on a plane and there’s nobody wearing a mask. And, you know, you think about it and you’re like, I would have been ridiculed if I got on a plane, maybe even kicked off the plane four years ago if I got on without a mask. Why? Well, because people have fear. And today we have knowledge of the virus. So we’ve overcome the fear, right? And then we have faith that if we do get COVID, it’s not going to be so bad. And so that’s how the approach we have to take in making mistakes and how we overcome. First of all, it’s don’t let fear stop you. You got to keep going. Number two, I always tell people is mindset. One of the biggest reasons why we make mistakes and things hold us back, not only in life, but in business, is people make statements, Corwyn. They make statements that stop them. They stop their mind. And I always tell people, when you make a statement, you close the mind. You’ve resolved to the statement versus, and I’ll tell you, some of the most intelligent people I’ve ever met are people who run podcasts. And the reason why is because you spend your day doing what? Asking questions. And when you make a statement, you close the mind. But when you ask questions, you open the mind. And opening the mind allows you to receive and be a conduit of information that allows you to enhance your abilities to grow. And so I always warn people, if you’re held back, if you’re struggling, you’re not moving forward, you’re stuck where you are, then start asking questions because questions open the mind. And what we find, Corwyn, is people don’t. They make statements. They go, I can’t do this. He did it, but I can’t. If I got out and run a 5K today, I’d have a heart attack. Well, is that true? I mean, maybe it is. If you believe it is, play it. I mean, it probably is. I mean, you can manifest. My mommy used to tell me all the time, Gary, be careful what you say. It might just happen. We grew up in the South and my mom had the sweetest disposition. She’s like, boy, you better be careful what you say. It might just happen. And I thought about that for years, but my mom was using it in a way of not being negative. But that resonated with me. I’ll tell you what happened one day, Corwyn. I woke up and I’m like, what happens if I say it and I want it to happen? So maybe I should start saying things I want to happen. And maybe I should start asking questions about the things I don’t think can. And that changed the mindset, opened me up to more possibilities. Listen, man, there ain’t no reason in the world a ninth grade dropout GED high school graduate should have built over 10 businesses, written six books, helped over 5,000 businesses around the world in nine countries. Ain’t no reason at all for me to be executed by the age of 22. There ain’t no reason for that success other than I didn’t let stuff stop me and I asked questions.
CORWYN:
Let’s take a short break.
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CORWYN:
But God, nothing but, because it doesn’t fit the traditional paradigm, norms that man has established that we oftentimes establish. That’s where our fallacy is right there. That’s what hinders us because as you made mention of earlier about people pursuing somebody else’s vision. That’s not your vision. God didn’t give that one to you or you didn’t bring it to him and say, Lord, look here, what can I do with this? Help me. You just, okay, what they had, they doing this. Let me try to do this too.
GARY:
Yeah, a hundred percent. I think it goes back to that. It goes back to our purpose. I feel God gives us purpose through our life. Life comes from three categories of life. It comes from your past. God’s giving you a love for something based on an experience you had. He’s giving you a future. The first area of our purpose comes from your past, which is what we love to do. The second area comes from your future, which is what do we want to be remembered for. When it’s all said and done, you know, Corwyn, at some point in your life, someone’s going to write your eulogy speech. Someone’s going to rock by your coffin for the final time. And they’re going to hope, and you’re going to hope that they look down and say, I’m sure glad that man lived his life. Because this is the change, the impact he made in mind. And so what do you want them to say? Because you have the opportunity to write that speech for them. There’s nothing sadder than going to a funeral and somebody saying, hey, does anybody know him? Anybody have anything they want to say? Nobody says anything, right? Well, I’ve been to funerals on the other side of that where people have a thousand things to say. Why? Because somebody chose to write the speech for them. And then the third area of our life that we give to our purpose is the present. So the past is what we love. The future is what we want to be remembered for. But today, the present comes from what gifts we have that we can give back to the world. And when we answer those three questions, what do we love to do? What do we want to be remembered for? And what gifts we have, we can give back to the world. That’s our purpose. And that should be the thing that spokes the vision or sparks the vision for our future. And that’s what we have to live intentionally for and create accountability around to make sure we fulfill it. Because I’ll tell you one thing, man, there’s nothing more disheartening than sitting in front of a doctor at the age of 35 and not know what your life’s purpose is. And to think to yourself, oh, dear God, what did I do with my life? Did I fulfill my purpose? We have to live life with intentionality that allows us to fulfill that purpose so we feel fulfilled when life’s end comes our way. And that’s a beautiful part. I mean, you think about Moses in the Bible, what did he have? He had a purpose, he had a vision, he had a path, he had a goal. And, you know, it started off, it didn’t start off with leading the Israelites out of Egypt, but it started off with building cities for Pharaoh. And it wasn’t until God came to him and he says, hey, listen, Moses, I need you to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. And he says, I ain’t your guy. And just like me, Corwyn, I didn’t feel like I was qualified to be where I am today, but God is glorified in our weakness, not our strength. And that’s what happened for me, same thing happened with Moses. Moses said, hey, what am I going to do? I’m not your guy, I don’t have the tongue, I’m not a leader. The guy says, I’m going to give you a new gift. And that’s when our purposes shift, right? Because he still had a love, he still wanted to be remembered, but the new gift came in and shifted his purpose. And I’ll leave this with your listeners and for you today too. At any point in your life, you feel downtrodden, you feel downhearted, you feel like life’s not where you want it to be. Take a long, deep look at your purpose, your past, what do you love to do? Your future, what do you want to be remembered for? But more importantly, has God given you new gifts? That’s changing your path. Because if he has, and you’re still chasing the old vision or somebody else’s vision, you’re never going to feel more despondent than you do in that moment.
CORWYN:
Wow, Gary, man, that was profound. This show kind of reminds me of when you sitting in church and the pastor gets up and they got their sermon ready. And next thing you know, they off script and somebody from the congregation holler, let them use you. Look here, there’s all fire from there. So Gary, my man, thank you for that. I want to share this with you because you are talking to me. My spirit has been worn, has been weak. Let me phrase that. I ain’t going to call it weak. It has been worn and weary because sometimes the statements that you hear are contrary to the desired outcome or what is greater, right? And that wears on you when you are someone who you speak life, but every time they open, somebody else opened a mouth, it sounds like they talking from the graveyard or something, right? And it wears on you. You know it. I know you know it. And sometimes you got to get a reset. You got to get back into that space. And when people who fundamentally get it and understand everything that you just said, which is we have the power of life and death of success and failure and of everything in not only our tongue, but in our faith and our belief and our actions that all coincide, you align all that together and you’ll see a life beyond measure. But thank you so much for what you shared so far today.
GARY:
Well, let me share this with you real quick because this is something you were saying this and it came down and I actually didn’t even remember this until right now. And this is something I wrote in my notes on my phone in 2011 when I got bit by a tick and I wrote the verse from Galatians 6, 9 it says, Let us not be weary in well-doing, for in due season we shall reap if we faint not. I said, I wrote this, I said, God knows weariness comes in our life even when we do the right thing. It could be in finances, relationships, my case health, or anything else that we’re praying that haven’t seen an answer to yet, right? And I think, so here’s what I wrote. I wrote five things. One is the Bible says don’t grow weary in well-doing. Number one, we have to do the well-doing. We have to keep going. We have to do that, which is right, even when we’re weary. Number two, we might be doing the right things and don’t see the results, but our due season is coming. Number three, don’t let the devil pull you away from the right thing with temptation. It’s a trick to wear you down. It’s kind of like a bullfighter. When a bullfighter is fighting a bull, he drops darts in the back of the bull just to drain him slowly until he falls. Number four, I find myself at my weakest point physically when I’m not doing the right things. And number five, last, we have to wait. We have to wait on the Lord. And I always say God answers prayers in three ways, Corwyn. Number one, yes. We all love that answer. Bring it on, bring it on. Like Oprah, you get a yes. You get a yes, right? Everyone wants a yes. Number two, no. The answer’s no. We don’t like that one. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like being told no. But you know the hardest answer that I have found in that time in my life when I was the sickest that I’d ever been was when he looks at you and says, wait. Because you know, yes, gratification immediately. No, disappointment immediately, but it’s still an answer. Whoa, wait, what, wait? You want me to wait?
CORWYN:
Look here, then we want a question. How long? How long do I got to do this? You got to do it until I tell you to stop.
GARY:
But you got to continue to do the right things while you’re waiting. And that’s the same thing in business, man. That’s what the Rise Business Framework’s all about. It’s doing the right way to build a business. Everybody always says they grew too fast. That’s why they failed. Ain’t no such thing as growing too fast. It’s growing wrong. Doing it wrong, that’s what creates failure. Doing it the right way, that’s what creates success.
CORWYN:
So Gary, where can our listeners go to connect? I mean, the fact that you are connected this way, which tells me fundamentally, automatically, that this is how you structure, how you advise, how you counsel. Because I mean, look here, from the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. This is you. This is who you are. So where can our listeners go to get more information about you, about the Rise Framework, anything about Sharper Business Solutions, what it is that you do, your company? Where can people connect with you at?
GARY:
Well, I mean, our website is sharperbusiness.com. We are on TikTok. I’m on Instagram. I’m on YouTube. I’m on multiple platforms, X, all those. So we put out a lot of content. I put out about two, three videos a day, typically, on those multiple platforms. But then you can find me there under official Gary Harper, our business. Platforms are Sharper Business on those platforms as well. But Sharper Business is kind of a centralized hub. If you want to get a copy of our books, you can go to Amazon. I have three books on Amazon. I have the Rise Business Framework, which is a curriculum book. It’s a tactical, take these steps to reach where you need to be. Then we have the Purpose to Rise, which is a fable about a real estate entrepreneur that uses the Rise Business Framework to reach success. On there, I also have, Is Your Business Sick? And so I told you my story of how I got sick. And the book there talks about parasites in life or parasites in your business. Because we have parasites in our business that hold us back. Sometimes we’re the parasite in our own business, by the way. So we can be that. And then I have a really fun book here. It’s right there. It’s called The Penny, the Purposeful Panda. It’s a children’s book on how finding your purpose. And I always think it’s so important to give even our kids purpose in life. Because without it, Bible says, where there’s no vision, the people perish. And I think we all need hope.
CORWYN:
Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, look here, my man, you have blown me out of my socks today. Oh, I appreciate that. You probably left them standing in the corner somewhere now because I’m over here and they gone. They gone. This has been an amazing conversation. I want to thank you for not only your time, but your gift, because the time Lord will give it back to you. But there’s no way in the world I could repay you for your gift. I appreciate that. So again, thank you. Thank you so much. So look here, Gary, I’m going to ask you this one, if you could just drop what we would consider to be a takeaway on our listeners today. Because from a legacy perspective, you focus on building, you focus on investing, and you focus on leading. And all those are designed to carry out the purpose. But for our listeners, drop that, if you could, that one takeaway for them for today’s show that they should take with them and carry that into and manifest that into what God has for them, their life, their business, their family, or wherever they wish to apply it.
GARY:
Yeah, I would say that a lot of people that I work with and a lot of listeners, I think listening to these shows, they’re trying to figure out life in general. And I say, you got to first focus on you and you got to first focus on making sure you’re healthy and that your mind is healthy and your spirit is healthy and where you’re going is healthy. You have no right to lead other people until you’ve led yourself first. And so I think the listeners need to walk away with what they need to do to work on themselves today. And then if they work on themselves and become the proper leaders of their companies, the business will follow, the relationships will follow, the success will follow. But you got to be willing to work on yourself first. And that’s one of the hardest things to do of everything, right? Like people will call me and say, hey, Gary, I’ll pay you $20,000 a day to come in and help my business. If you come to my event, if you could do this, we do that. But I’ll tell you what, Corwyn, as soon as I say, hey, I’m going to have a self-accountability seminar or workshop and I don’t even charge for it. It’s crickets, people don’t want to show up for. And so I think we got to remind people today that it starts with you. Now I’m reminded every time I get on a plane and the stewardess says, hey, listen, if we have turbulence and we lose cabin pressure and the mask is going to drop it and they remind us to put our mask on first. You know why? Because we have no right or ability to help other people if we’re not healthy ourselves. So today I challenge you to refocus, refocus on you, lead you first, the rest will follow.
CORWYN:
That is powerful. So Gary, again, thank you so much for being on with us today. I really appreciate it. For our listeners, my God, you’ve gotten a playbook. If you do nothing else, I need you to make sure you got your notes and keep them handy, right? Stick them on your mirror, put them on a dash in the car, put them on your cubicle at work. If you’ve got, matter of fact, get your oil and keep your oil with you too and make everything around you greasy. That way nothing bad sticks to you and you are nurtured and taken care of and protected by it. And y’all know what I mean. So thank you so much again, Gary, for our listeners. Look guys, you know how I feel. You know what I say. I always put the two of those things together. You have the two of them things and I give it to you this way, which is to tell you that I love you. I love you. And we’re going to see you guys out there in those streets.
